Misc

"Famous Last Words"
Some have actually been said
"Famous Last Words" are funny sentences that someone might say right before they die. For example:

"I wonder where the mother bear is."
"This doesn't taste right."
"These are the good kind of mushrooms."
An Englishman
entered a bar..................
An Englishman entered a bar and stood beside a Scotsman. After they had chatted for a while the Scot asked "Where are you from?" The Englishman replied "I'm from the finest country in the world." The Scot looked sceptical and replied "Are you? You have a damn funny accent for a Scotsman."
Short
but sweet
What's the definition of a pessimist? A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.